I'm not even going to explain it. It's not really worth whining but I need to get something out of me by writing this. I should not be surprised that the world isn't right but still. And then, then when you try to do the right thing, you'll get shouted at, ignored, destroyed. And then you'll wonder if the right thing is really the right thing. And if perhaps you should be taking a different perspective, doing things differently, acting differently.
I suppose we all hate or at least dislike ourselves sometimes. That is what I currently feel. And some people blame this for the way I acted sometimes. When in reality it is they who are the reason I act that way. And it is they who make me wish I were somebody else. So nice guys finish last, and the real test is if you stay strong and all that jazz.
I used to pride myself on my attempts to be loyal, morally upright and all that jazz but I am beginning to wonder if it's all a bit in vain really. And I'm not saying I want to go all the way down the line and commit crimes and cheat and stuff. I just think I might be a bit tightly wound, so I might loosen up and stop trying to be the Guardian and stuff. Take care.
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